THE [DREADED] 'L' WORD

[Blame this on Valentines day or whatever]

Tell me, really, what is love?

Forget Webster’s definition of the word or what all those mushy love songs croon about. What is it, somebody tell me? Now, don’t get me wrong; it’s not like I’m over here all destitute thinking about what could be but isn’t – no. I’m just trying to understand what all the hype is about.

I must admit I’m more than a little skeptical about the love thing. I’ve seen too many people go through too much $hit to trust love implicitly. I’ve seen people hurt, cheated on, mad about or just plain fed up over love. Sometimes trying to love is as futile as a car chase. That, I’ll be honest with y’all, is not stuff I’d want to go through at all so if this is what love entails, love needs to have another think coming to try and entice me to its camp!

Like everyone else, I suspect, I thought I was in love once [or twice.] I was kicking myself after it was all over with coz it’s almost as if, during the entire period, I was in some sort of daze, and when I snapped out of it I realized what an idiot I’d been. Not only that, but I was looking for the wrong attribute – beauty. Kanye told it like it is when he said ‘the prettiest people do the ugliest things.’ Physical appearance is important, I agree, but it’s far from being the ‘staple’ that attracts you to the other person.

Which begs the question: if beauty is not it, what is then? That, dear reader, is a question I still have no answer to. I’ve resigned myself to the fact that I don’t know $hit when it comes to what girl I’d wanna be with. I guess I’ll just have to wait to be surprised, but I still think about it tho. I also remind myself that perfection isn’t attainable in this lifetime. I’m far from it, so why should I expect the girl to be perfect?

There’s only one girl in this lifetime that ever had me feel like I might be in love, at least according to all the mushy songs that talk about love and joy and hurt. No one ever made me as happy, or as sad, or as angry, or as whatever else, as she did. No one else, before or since. What’s worse, it was over between us even before it really got started. But enough about that; that’s water under the bridge.

Anyhow, what’s a brother to do to understand the love thing? All I wanna do is understand it, damnit! I’ve met girls with all these strong attributes that are extremely alluring, but would that suffice as love? How about those very few [who are already taken by the way] with the whole beauty+sexiness+intelligence+street-smarts+ aggressiveness+gulliness package like my good friends Wams or Kacu? Should that be what I should be looking for?

In any case I’m like whateva man. The best things [or worst, unfortunately] hit you when you least expect it. I guess I’ll wait till I get knocked senseless. I’ve got 99 problems and, unfortunately, understanding the love thing is one of them.

**Disclaimer: This post is for entertainment purposes only. It may not necessarily reflect the author’s opinion, namely me. But then again, it may.