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Laid back; chilled out.

Tuesday, February 21, 2006


[Blame this on Valentines day or whatever]

Tell me, really, what is love?

Forget Webster’s definition of the word or what all those mushy love songs croon about. What is it, somebody tell me? Now, don’t get me wrong; it’s not like I’m over here all destitute thinking about what could be but isn’t – no. I’m just trying to understand what all the hype is about.

I must admit I’m more than a little skeptical about the love thing. I’ve seen too many people go through too much $hit to trust love implicitly. I’ve seen people hurt, cheated on, mad about or just plain fed up over love. Sometimes trying to love is as futile as a car chase. That, I’ll be honest with y’all, is not stuff I’d want to go through at all so if this is what love entails, love needs to have another think coming to try and entice me to its camp!

Like everyone else, I suspect, I thought I was in love once [or twice.] I was kicking myself after it was all over with coz it’s almost as if, during the entire period, I was in some sort of daze, and when I snapped out of it I realized what an idiot I’d been. Not only that, but I was looking for the wrong attribute – beauty. Kanye told it like it is when he said ‘the prettiest people do the ugliest things.’ Physical appearance is important, I agree, but it’s far from being the ‘staple’ that attracts you to the other person.

Which begs the question: if beauty is not it, what is then? That, dear reader, is a question I still have no answer to. I’ve resigned myself to the fact that I don’t know $hit when it comes to what girl I’d wanna be with. I guess I’ll just have to wait to be surprised, but I still think about it tho. I also remind myself that perfection isn’t attainable in this lifetime. I’m far from it, so why should I expect the girl to be perfect?

There’s only one girl in this lifetime that ever had me feel like I might be in love, at least according to all the mushy songs that talk about love and joy and hurt. No one ever made me as happy, or as sad, or as angry, or as whatever else, as she did. No one else, before or since. What’s worse, it was over between us even before it really got started. But enough about that; that’s water under the bridge.

Anyhow, what’s a brother to do to understand the love thing? All I wanna do is understand it, damnit! I’ve met girls with all these strong attributes that are extremely alluring, but would that suffice as love? How about those very few [who are already taken by the way] with the whole beauty+sexiness+intelligence+street-smarts+ aggressiveness+gulliness package like my good friends Wams or Kacu? Should that be what I should be looking for?

In any case I’m like whateva man. The best things [or worst, unfortunately] hit you when you least expect it. I guess I’ll wait till I get knocked senseless. I’ve got 99 problems and, unfortunately, understanding the love thing is one of them.

**Disclaimer: This post is for entertainment purposes only. It may not necessarily reflect the author’s opinion, namely me. But then again, it may.


strawberries are said...

Love is :-
pure joy.
pure hate.
wanting to shout off mountains.
wanting to bury oneself.
Love is smiling.
Love is crying.
Love is being alive
Love is wanting to die.
Love is insatiable.
Love is obsessive, possessive.
Love is the only cement that will hold us together or wait is that friendship?

OOPs did i blog on your blog?. sorry

Keguro said...

I blogged for 14 days about love

Now, you sound like one of my students: I hand out an assignment, explain it for 20 minutes, ask if there are any questions, get none.

Two weeks later, an email: "Does this class have any assignments?"

Anonymous said...

LOL@ Keguro!

Man I would love to answer your question, but what the hell do I know - I have been asking myself that but all I can say is - you never know till you are face down in the mud that you were actually going downhill, fast (lol I just made that one up, brilliant arent I?)

Funnily enough, I was asking myself the whole love thing on my way to work this morning, and I am still fuzzily sorting out where the hell the fog started and the clarity ended - am I going round in circles, stuck in a loop, repeating myself?

Heck what did you expect, I did state that I had no clue.

Anyway, let me see (LOL if you believe I am going to answer any question, then you are gully-ble... tihihihi)

Love is: Given freely, without any ulterior motive

Love is: When you can do absolutely anything for anyone, without any expectations (lol that is such a lie)

Love is: What I feel for my little sister (leave me alone, she is the cutest thing and she IS my sister, so back off)

Love is: Knowing that you have another's heart in your hand, and choosing not to toss it into the mud (please refer to the downhill movement above) but putting it in cotton wool and looking after it (am I doing mushy stuff right there? Please find a big stick hit me over the head, and then shake me a little - ah, back off)

Love is: Trust me, when that sucker is sitting on your face asking you : Who's the dadddy you will know and say, YOU ARE LOL

I believe I have exhausted my quarter of being silly for the day - but I am still giddy about the 'aye aye captain scenario' lol

Hi >d®

Nakeel said...

Love is that lie whispered to your ears when you want to hear about it soo bad.


Anonymous said...

According to my good friend owen wilson in wedding crashers, "Love is the soul's recognition of its counterpart in another." Love is an age old phenomena, most of the time inexplicable. It is one of those things that "just are".
Nice ref. to past "friends". Hmmmm...still lustin r we?

N nice disclaimer.

>D. (One who 'loves' u)

Anonymous said...

I don't know what Love is. I fall into a whole range of emotions and confuse them with love. The main ones are lust, obsession, dependency & co-dependency, controlism, friendship-ism... etc. Of all anathemas, it is the best and the worst to suffer from as it brings out the best when things are good and the worst when things go bad. I wish you all lots and lots of LOVE!


Adrian said...

and i thought this post was going to be about that lesbian programme...

Anonymous said...

LOL@ Adrian.... FUNNNYYY!

Back to >d®

I wouldnt even begin to think that I know what love is, my dear but what I THINK is that, we have put so much expectations on love hence why we are perturbed by it....

Check out 1 Corinthians 13.... I dont get it but maybe it will help!!!

|d®| said...

>Strawberries: Wsup. My thing is, is love even worth all the trouble? Couldn't there be some over arrangement, like a harmonious co-habitation?

>Keguro: I read and re-read all the
'chronicles,' with my Webster right next to me, of course! For whatever reason the meaning was lost on me tho!

>Guess: LOL @ "..sitting on your face." Wow.
The one about having someone else's heart in your palm and choosing to nurture it instead of crushing it is pretty deep tho - I kinda-sorta see what you're saying.
If love is unconditional & never-ending tho, why does it sometimes fade away in to resentment and bitterness and regret? Does that mean that it wasn't love in the first place?

>Nakeel: Ha ha, good one! Yeah, BS sometimes can be music to sore ears!

|d®| said...

>D: "Mazel Tov!" [I love that movie. They're so stupid!]
Nice explanation Owen came up with tho, I must say.
Trust you to notice my disclaimer! You know me too well. Mad love back at you, girl!

>CK: Better to have loved some than not at all, eh?
You got that right - love's got such high highs & low lows it's crazy. The whole thing drives me crazy!

>Adrian: Maybe that can be the topic of the next post. Instead of
THE [DREADED] 'L' WORD it would be
How's that?! :)

>Ciiku: What up Buff. Good word - perturbed.
That chapter is so demanding! [Just kidding] I guess then few people are really in love coz I doubt everyone does it like chapter 13. What you think about that?

mutumia said...

LOL @ Guess, Keguro and Adrian-- sheesh- nearly everyone in your comments section seems to be a comedian @Guess again, I'm lovin'& lovin' that that cottonwool instead of mud explanation!!!

@ >d® I'm pretty sure I know what love is not- but as to what it is? Not so much...Um...from what I think perhaps I sorta remember, it's, inter alia :),when someone makes sense to you. Like--- like you feel it's right, you recognize (body, senses, smell etc.) that this ... while not perfect blah blah blah--- is sufficient and actually abundant for the day...

Prousette said...

Love is faithful, love is kind blah blah.I have no idea what love is in other words. It just IS and not those others!
I'm making no sense then again who does when the L word is involved, may I think a little more and see what I come up with?

@Keguro there are plenty of students who went through the chronicles , paying attention AND taking copious notes but none the wiser by the end of the lesson.

Anonymous said...

Brain restored to some semblance of sanity (If you believe that, then you shouldnt even read this, IT NEVER IS, MY BRAIN - it kinda flitters between deeply insane, comedic with a hint of sarcasm, downright gutterised and otherwise intelligent, but mostly all in one, capiscé) Lets go!

Love to ME means:

Knowing that someone is not perfect, will never be, and you are quite happy to go with that cos they fulfil other 'desires' and 'expectations' that you look for in a human
Love is knowing that someone accepts my eccentricities, my 'child' behaviour - (note, not childish, 'child' there is a difference - see my latest post if you havent already) - my wanting to be alone at times, my intelligence (or lack thereof) and can live with that without using them as a stick to badger me to submission.

Love is seeing someone you love in pain and feeling the pain too, and wanting to do your damnest best to sort it out, even when you cant
Love is wanting to do the best for the best you are with, and wanting the best for them
Love is You make me want to be a better person Jack Nicholson to Helen Hunt: As good as it gets.
Love is knowing the worst thing about the person you are with, and knowing that the best thing about them way way outweighs that.

Did I mention that I may be certifiable, if anyone is brave enough to make me :D

LOL >d® did someone appoint me as your alter blogger and give me unlimited access - I gotta go ruffle Mutumia's Owl feathers since I got home first...

Anonymous said...

Did I fail to mention that I didnt think about that 'sucker sitting on your face' until you mentioned it - My gutterised brain might have been sleeping, but since its 'awoke' the reverse about who is on the face stands...

Please do not barr me from commentin like Mutumia has, cos I reaaly really love you and your blog (ass kissing at its best right there)

OK I'll go now, dont bother kicking me out, but I'LL BE BACK

Anonymous said...

OMG!! The one day that I show restraint... OK.. me I loved that sitting part he he he.

As for Keg's chronicles, they just might get me um.... a date this summer.

Ngoja tuu!
LOL @ Prou--- whaaat???!!!

|d®| said...

>Mutumia: Wsup.
@ "..like you feel it's right," don't you sometimes feel like that and then later on you'd be like OMG, what the hell was I doing?! But you're right tho - it would suffice for a day or two! :)

>Prou: I feel you tho - love is probably inexplicable. It's almost as it it's everything and nothing, all at the same time!

>Guess: Your input's always appreciated, 4 real. Since you're barred from 'certain' blogs, feel free to comment here as much as you'd like! ;)
Dang, you seem to have a semblance of understanding about this love thing. I'm not there yet but keep going - the more you expound on it the clearer the murk gets!

|d®| said...

>Mutumia: My bad girl; couldn't help but crack on you about barring G out! :)

Anonymous said...

Ai now that storo of love is one I tossed out the window sometime back.Luckily I got a chance to fall in love as young man with little to lose and make a total fool of myself.But I do indulge in a few harmless crushes here and there.I think add to this not the high but eclectic expectations I have and many many chics I meet fall short and the ones who do meet them are usually taken.I say meet someone you can live with and be happy.Remember love is just an emotion and you cant run on that alone......

Farmgal said...

>d® I cant help you there, lakini I think love is forgiving. You need alot of that to be in love!
my 2bob

Whispering Inn said...

@ Keguro - LOL!

Looooooovve luv luv love love Love!

What is love, indeed?!

I WISELY stay away from such heavy words.

|d®| said...

>Aco: Preach, preacher! Yeah, all a man - or woman - needs is someone who recognizes and accepts their partner's imperfections, as exasperating as they might be.

>Farmgal: Oh yeah, forgiveness is key. There's a limit to it tho, coz dude might be spoiled if he's like: Aaa, I know she'll take me back no matter what.
U feel me tho?

>Whispering Inn: I heard that! Don't use that word loosely fellas, if only to avoid further complicating an already complicated situation!