BUSHED, RANTING AND RAVING

Why does everyone seems to want something from >d® lately? [At work, I mean] It’s been insane, for real. Everyone and their mama knows when Christmas is, needless to say. Submit all your graphics orders well in advance, damnit!

Why then, pray tell, wait a week before Christmas to suddenly order stuff? Then the customers have the audacity to call me every hour on the hour talking about: ‘Is it ready yet?” Graphic design is serious business and I hate putting crap out there. In a perfect world I’d want any >d® Original Design to induce oohs and aahs from anyone looking at it. I love it when I’m driving around and see a sign I made; it’s gratifying. Some self-proclaimed ‘artistically liberated’ customers force me though to put $hit out there that I’d never ordinarily create and that’s what’s been happening this week, as much as I dislike it.

That’s when the GIGO principle comes to play, the Garbage In, Garbage Out principle. They give me scrawled-out, damn near indecipherable designs and I’m supposed to magically transform them into designs akin to those in the Sistine Chapel? Getouttahere, like mutumia says!

Shoot, maybe I should’ve handed some of these customers copies of the sign hanging over my trash can that reads: Lack of preparation on your part does not constitute an emergency on my part. [The sign hangs over the trash can coz that’s where the order is going if the customer keeps bugging. >d don’t play!]

Hmm…. maybe, with the sign, I should also include a copy of my Friendship Prayer, thanks to CK, that also hangs somewhere in my office. That one brings me nothing but comfort every time I feel my fist itching to go through the drywall. It reads: May the fleas of a thousand camels infest the crotch of the person that ruins your day; and may their arms be too short to scratch. I instantly feel the stress lessen every time I read that one, believe you me.

Now that the bitching session is over, let me be out. Hopefully I’ll revert to my usual, reasonably amicable self by tomorrow; joy had better come in the morning!