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Laid back; chilled out.

Wednesday, February 20, 2008


Winter sucks. There's another wannabe snowfall brewing outside, though I guarantee the resulting slush will all be melted and drained off to Lord-knows-where by mid-afternoon tomorrow.

Seems like the climactic, climatic [or is it apocalyptic?] predictions of 'The Day After Tomorrow,' the movie, might hold some water after all. I mean, how can it be a spring-like 65 degrees Fahrenheit here Monday, smack in mid-winter, and at the same time have arctic-like temperatures in Afghanistan, then back to frigid & blustery here today? It's the end of the world as we know it, methinks.


Thank God for funny people:
Recently, I've had someone boldly proclaim that, and I quote, 'they could have me if they wanted me.' Wow. Hope she manages to stoke into life some flames that can thaw this icebox that used to be my heart. And yes, that's a challenge, sparky.

Or how about 'Geisha?' She had me LMAO while at some intersection waiting for green, other drivers glancing over at me like I was crazy, talking about:

Hey you.
This is your shawty, tenderoni,
your booty call when you're horny.

Not only was that delivered with no hesitation, but it was completely unrehearsed. Made it all the funnier.


Dean Koontz is sick-with-it when it comes to imagery. Not only does he have the ill grammar, but he's so descriptive it's ridiculous. His sentences are quite complex too.
For instance, here's an excerpt
from one of his books, 'Fear Nothing,' below. And no, the book's more about the 'intellectually enlightened' rather than the creepy. [I don't do creepy. Let's just say I have an over-active imagination.]
He has a way of getting one shook throughout the book, then helping rationalize everything at the near-end. Infuriating, yes, but very slick. Keeps one interested.
But anyway, here's the excerpt:

I would not have been surprised to see an alabaster corpse silently risen from its steel sarcophagus, standing before me, face greasy with death and glimmering in the butane lambency, eyes wide but blind, mouth working to impart secrets but producing not even a whisper. No cadaver confronted me, but serpents of light and shadow slipped from the fluttering flame and purled across the steel panels, imparting an illusion of movement to the drawers, so that each receptacle appeared to be inching outward.

Dude's wicked. I dare you - try one of his books out, if you haven't already.


"Huh? What? Oh, you miss me? Yeah, I've been thinking about you too baby, all day long. Come to mama? Oh yeah, i'mma do that right now. Wait- let me strip down to my boxers, slip some socks on and I'll be right there in a quick minute. Can't wait to slide in between your sheets, savor your inextinguishable warmth."

Oh, I'm sorry - that was a convo between my bed and I. Gotta go.


gishungwa said...

*Sploosh into the gutter* after that last paragraph am ok though.
Believing in one self is what that shawty is doing. I can achieve if i believe.

farmgal said...

Eeerrr that 'I can get it you if I wanted' no words!

Aegeus said...

heh heh, that one for the bed...my mind had taken off with me.

D said...

LMAO...PERIOD! So I'm not the only one who could get you if she wanted...good to know...JK. N the geisha piece? LMAO double time. Same girl indeed.

Anonymous said...

You're so tagged..pole. See my blog for details.

>d® said...

My bad y'all; all caught up in the paper-chase. Some of all that cheddar I've been making for bossman this month better trickle down to my paycheck!

>Gish: Believing in herself? I never know when she means stuff - she's serious when she's kidding and kidding when she seems serious.

>Aegeus: For real tho, I'm in love with my bed. After a long, hard day I see the bed and start tingling in anticipation, heart hammering away in my chest.

>Farmgal: I know right? That's borderline overconfidence right there. I kinda like that tho.

>D: To stick to the 'Same Girl' script:
Wait a minute, wait a minute
Just wait one doggone minute.

What, you too - have me if you wanted?
What if I told you the reality of the matter is the flipside of that equation?

D said...

Hahaha...let's not get carried away...like i always tell ya...don't flatter urself.

U know i luh u!

D said...

Hahaha...let's not get carried away...like i always tell ya...don't flatter urself.

U know i luh u!

D said...

p.s. "And you can't tell me that you didn't see the ring on MY finger..." So yea, ur fantasy will unfortunately remain just that.

>d® said...

Never say never, shawty.
Like, 10 years ago, you'd never have imagined rubbing shoulders with the movers and the shakers, right? [or is it the ballers, shot-callers, brawlers?]

Not to say I'm a shot-caller right now, but I will be someday, and you just might be rubbing shoulders - to say the least - with me then!