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Laid back; chilled out.

Tuesday, May 16, 2006

CROSS-OVER

*This is a cross-over post from the Speed Resource.

The farther up you go the further down you have to reach.

I’d never fully grasped that much-used phrase’s meaning till a week or so ago. It’s been crazy lately, ladies and gentlemen, crazy.

Driving is therapeutic. For me anyway. Like, I could put the Alpines to work and risk shattering all the glass in the Lancer [all the while enjoying an inadvertent backrub from the vibration] Or, I could listen to RnB, get myself all caught up in the flipside of the love equation and empathize with Mary J or Anthony Hamilton or Toni Braxton. Or maybe I could get myself in the mood with some throw-back Joe or Gerald Lavert. Or I could shut everything off and just listen to the modern marvel that is the internal combustion engine. Either way I’ll enjoy the driving experience, regardless.

The male ego is such that we’re powerless to resist tho. Allow me to explain using a couple of examples.

I might be coasting on i95, windows down, music up. An overdressed Honda pulls up alongside me, loud-ass muffler permeating the usual road noise. The driver, NFL cap backwards, gives the Lancer a once-over and gives me the nod. Now, I’ve got 2 choices: ignore Honda dude and keep driving, or accept the challenge, downshift to third and wait for dude to so much as twitch.

I’m guilty of the latter, every time.

I might be leaving the crib for work, still half-asleep and all, when I pull up to the stop sign & see young’ns huddled together across the street waiting for the school bus. Now, I have the choice of driving away in a nice, normal inconspicuous manner, or I could decide to put on a show for the young’ns: rev the Lancer up, pop the clutch and leave behind skid marks that would make your underwear jealous.

I’m guilty of the latter, every time.

A few nights ago I was driving to the crib. The weather sucked – it was raining bullets and the roads were slick. Did I mention visibility was essentially zero? I’d just come from b-balling and all I wanted was a shower & some shuteye. I almost missed my exit on i95, but managed to squeeze in between a Mazda 6 and an all-white, unmarked Ford van. [One of my many nicknames is fender-grazer. Self explanatory, I believe.] No sooner had I done so than the headlamps of the nondescript van started getting bigger and bigger in my rearview.
Now, I could’ve just let dude pass me, possibly flick me off and proceed with a false sense of satisfaction. Never that. Let’s just say he never even got to see the state the Lancer is registered in, and not because of the inclement weather.

I’ve been known to do stuff like that, more times than I remember. Don’t get me wrong – I realize it’s nothing to brag about. Or is it?

At times tho, the ego takes a back seat to other things. Like, the one-handed steering wheel grip is by far the most popular. Few people hold the wheel with both hands these days, especially black folk. I must admit it ‘looks’ a lot better than the two-handed grip. Since I’m somewhat the advanced driver, I’m oft [you like that word G., don’t you?] faced with a dilemma: conform to the public’s definition of cool by driving one-handed, or grip that wheel with both hands and be like the semi-pro driver that I’d like think I am, and in the process look nerdy?

Who the hell cares what people think? Performance First, I say.

16 comments:

Farmgal said...

am first

Farmgal said...

I pray for you D..that you dnt get sent down again..honestly I pray!

Guessaurus said...

Yes I like the word 'oft - kinda makes you sound posh - and by extension nerdy - what? What? You forgot the Abyss post already?

This post make me giggle in various stages. skid marks that make your innawear jealous? LOL dude you gone done lost it.

That showing off might be impressive and 'cool' but you know the downside dont you - those boys in black over at neck of the woods dont take kindly to flossy folk, especially flossy black folk...

And beware of white van men - them people are proper dodgy.

*Joining Farmgal on knees*

>d® said...

>Farmgal: I need those prayers girl, please keep them coming!
Seriously tho, I'm waayyy better than I used to be, tho I can't say I'm exactly docile behind the wheel!

>Guess: Trust me, that's the primary reason I stayed well ahead of the dude in the white van; cats like that have an infamous repertoire of being... weird, to say the least!
Ha ha, I see you don't just skim thru my posts!
ps: There's a dude over here at work we call "Skee." Don't ask.

UARIDI said...

It is not ego. It is a young lion's desire to roar in the jungle that is in all males. The car is your roar and the roads your jungle.

Enjoy the trip - soon scary things like commitment and responsiblitiy and sharing your life will take permanent residence in your life.

>d® said...

You have no idea how much better you make me feel about my 'speed problem.' Thanks!

Movie Buff said...

I see white vans, and I change lanes. I always think they are following me and want to kidnap me or rob me or rape me or something. They creep me out. White Vans that is......!! Paranoia? Me dont think so. You just cant be too safe!

>d® said...

Buff, you paranoid? Never that, I don't think!

Movie Buff said...

Its called watching too much TV.... Criminal Minds, CSI, Cold Case.... Its always a WHITE VAN.... Spooky if u ask me!

D said...

i'll second movie buff on that...my seeing a white van is like seein an unmarked ford. Thou shalt not be drivin behind me. I always rather such vehicles be infront, not even to the side of me. N hell yes, i'll call out my own paranoia, U dont have to tell me. N it is definitely a result of CSI, and all that. Then again if Grissom was the one in the van or Gibbs (NCIS) just have a sticker sayin so...i'll gladly pull over. lol. (put Warrick on that list too, or Shemar's character on CM) On the real tho, we'll start a prayer group for u n ur need for speed.

LMAO on makin ppl's "draws" jealous! That was hilarious. N trust me, at this point in the day, post lunch on a gloomy day, its takin a lot to get me to laugh.

still countin the ways?

V^6 said...

Nice i like, always nice to hear what u'r up to, makes some of us feel holy, ( in part) tuko pamoja - keep on enjoying it,to add onto what uaridi said, soon you might end up trading the lancer for a ka-Minivan, and the only road trips you'll have will be taking kids to the soccer game.(JK)
Enjoy

V^6 said...

Nice i like, always nice to hear what u'r up to, makes some of us feel holy, ( in part) tuko pamoja - keep on enjoying it,to add onto what uaridi said, soon you might end up trading the lancer for a ka-Minivan, and the only road trips you'll have will be taking kids to the soccer game.(JK)
Enjoy

V^6 said...

Nice i like, always nice to hear what u'r up to, makes some of us feel holy, ( in part) tuko pamoja - keep on enjoying it,to add onto what uaridi said, soon you might end up trading the lancer for a ka-Minivan, and the only road trips you'll have will be taking kids to the soccer game.(JK)
Enjoy

>d® said...

>D: OMG, too funny! And yes, there are so many ways to count I don't even know where to begin, really!

>V^6: I see you inadvertently hit me with the 1 - 2, only this time it's the 1 -2 - 3!

What, me in a minivan?! Never that!

Actually, I never should say never, right? In which case my minivan would be rolling on Eibachs with Alpine type-R subs in the trunk!

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