About Me

My photo
Laid back; chilled out.

Tuesday, September 30, 2008

WOULDN'T YOU KNOW IT

Marcus told Mike Lowrey, in Bad Boys 2 the movie:
"You know, Mike, I had an epiphany. You know?
I realized you're an enigma. God sent you here to test me."

I feel like Martin sometimes, as I'm sure we all do, coz Lord knows there are things that test us every day.

For instance, tell me why, the very next day after coming back from HersheyPark, I was flipping through a recent issue of Popular Mechanics and stumbled across this article about some of the meanest roller coasters. Up there with the best of them was the one coaster in HersheyPark I did not get on, the Fahrenheit. The author of the article was raving about it, talking about hitting, at some point, 5G.
5 F-ING G?! That's more than astronaunts experience during liftoff! And I missed that?! [Insert lengthy expletives here]

Then, picture this: This one dude has been friends with this one girl forever. Nothing ever happened between them. Then he met some other girl. They
instantly liked each other and started going out. Now his friend is all hurt; she 'suddenly' realized she loved him. What's a brother to do?

Good Lawd! Check this out. And someone has the audacity to even suggest it? I'll be damned.

The Slo-Z has almost been annihilated twice. A minivan almost totalled it one time, the entire right side pushed in. Then, thanks to spirited driving and wet tarmac, the left front wheel hit the concrete median and snapped like a twig, almost messing up the gearbox. Somehow, the insurance guy said the car could be fixed.
I had this top-notch amplifier and speakers in the trunk and I'd thought of taking them out while it was being fixed but the owner of the repair shop, predictably, told me no one would touch them. A month later, when I went to pick the car up, tell me why the trunk was empty - the amp & speakers, even the wires, were gone. These fools had even emptied the coins in the ashtray. So I went to the owner, furious, and he calmed me down, asked me how much the stuff had been worth and cut me a check. And would you know it, the check bounced. And suddenly, according to the unenthusiastic receptionist who picked up my couple of hundred calls over the following months, the owner wasn't ever available. Lord, gimme strength.

And if I see another lady clutch her purse when she sees me approaching, d®'s gonna have to choke a b*tch.

7 comments:

Unknown said...

Wassup VA boy... still kicking it...
is that why you've been MIA???
Holla

|d®| said...

Wat up man. My bad for being MIA - paper-chase, school, the works. Been OK tho. I'll be in 'shags' in a few weeks; I'm sure I'll see you then.

KK said...

Pole on the loss... I read ur post on the work you had done on it. I have a 2000 Jetta VR6 that was already hooked up when I bought it... I was rather ignorant at the time about all the specs but have come to appreciate them over the years.

Kenya's Dopest Chic said...

Dont get me wrong human milk is like the most healthy thing when youre like 6 months...shits disgusting!!!

Hehe couldnt help oversee someones reppin the 2up 2 down too... the common wealth sucks ass!!

|d®| said...

>KK: The VR6 is an a-m-a-z-i-n-g engine; my boy's GTI has that same engine too - so much low-end torque!
What giddy-up goodies are in your Jetta?

>KD: The thought of imbibing human milk in ice cream strait gives me the willies. No can do!
Trust me girl, VA is where it's at.
The state slogan - Virginia Is For Lovers - is proof enough that great things abound down here!

Kenya's Dopest Chic said...

Umm such is not the case when youre stuck in the "7 cities". I bet your ass is like 15 minutes away from the district..thats why you say so. If not for school, and home cooked meals from mom dukes..i would be out!! well im actually reconsidering up north, closer to Govt jobs.

|d®| said...

Ha ha, you're right, DC's right here! And I know exactly what u mean coz yo, my lil cuz goes to Liberty University & holy sh*t, there's nothing down there. There was even a 10-mile stretch with no AT&T reception!

Holla at your 'urban' boy then when up North. lol!