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Laid back; chilled out.

Sunday, December 16, 2007

CONSTRUCTIVE [SELF] CRITICISM.

Note to self - I think I'm a loner. Wonder why I never quite thought about it. The only reason I even realized this is because I actually hung out with people this weekend. Not went out, just chilled with them. Usually I'm out of town spending entire weekends on the road, or I'm here in VA working most of the time. Hot damn, I really AM a loner!

I also realized I'm a pretty terrible friend. Matter of fact, I don't even know why some people keep me around. Not that I'm terrible to friends, no. I love them all to death, but I just don't show or tell them. For instance, I'm not attached to my cellie at all. I sometimes even leave it in the car, then go get it several hours later for the sole reason that I needed to, say, download a photo from it. It will ring and most of the time I'll look at it disinterestedly, then go back to whatever it is I was doing. Three, four days later is when I actually get to listen to messages, can you believe that? That's just wrong, coz what if someone was in an actual emergency and I wasn't there? That hasn't happened yet, thank God, but what if it did? That would really suck.

On the way back tonight I saw a reaaallly bad accident right here by the crib and that's when I had a trois-à-trois, so to speak, with me, myself and I. The >d® dressed in red on my left shoulder didn't say anything at all this time around, but the >d® dressed in all white, with the halo, on my right shoulder was like:
Damn dude, your punk ass could be gone tomorrow, just like that. Either that, or someone dear to you might be. What unsaid things would you regret not having shared with your friends or family? You need to get your sh*t together homeboy, and be better to people that give two sh*ts about your sorry ass.

Indeed, I need to. So, for the record, to anyone out there that I've been a complete ass to, my bad. More importantly, I'll change that about myself. As uncharacteristically decisive as I've been lately, I know I'll change. Can't afford not to.

That said, gotta go catch some winks, get some shuteye, count sheep, all that good stuff. Have yourself a good week.

6 comments:

Farmgal said...

Nice post dude! All the best with trying to change that bit about yourself.

>d® said...

Wsup. Thanks; it'll have to change.

Have a good one.

D said...

trois-a-wat??? Damn...for real, quit w/ the big words. I'm not even gonna comment on the phone etiquette thing, cuz u know my views on that. (you have reached....i'm bad at checking voicemails....UGH! CHANGE IT!!!) As per never showing/telling the people you love that u do in fact love them, I'll second the not showing, though with hesitation. U always tell me, n i guess 1.5hrs of driving on a whim is ur way of showing it. I guess i'll say thanks n that ur much appreciated...ur still my #1 wrung...lol, transformers n sweaters notwithstanding. Go easy on urself pops. Damn, age IS catchin up w/ u.

>d® said...

You'd be surprised how many got peeved over that voice message. lol! But like I'd said, it didn't even last a day; it's like trying out a new toy, messing with it all the time. You missed the one with lil' cuz in it, not to mention the one with yours truly reenacting a famous scene from Training Day. [Think You wanna go to jail or you wanna go home?

On another note, you should've been there to see yours and my boy graduating; I guarantee you would re-evaluate y'all's relationship!

I know, I crack myself up.

D said...

Now who's hopeless? Here's ur next message: "Hi, you've reached Cupid...if I've given you bad advice lately, or keep pushing you towards someone, press 1..." jk

>d® said...

Hey hey, don't be knockin' my gift now! They don't be calling me 'The Wise Man' for nothing; I dispense invaluable boy-girl advice, and you know this.

I just can't apply the same advice in my own life, as u well know.